Well, what do Lou Reed and Metallica have in common? You don’t need to think it over… the answer is nothing! So, that probably would have been the collaboration of the year… if the artists had something in common but it turns out to be the disaster of the year and now that I’m thinking it again… the worst moment of Metallica’s carrier! I do not care about Lou Reed… he is beyond my musical taste and I never cared for his music or his lyrics in the least.

 

But, hey we’re talking about Metallica here… one of the biggest metal groups in the planet. It took them several years to recover from that goddamn early 90s era, when they were “evolving musically” by releasing a bunch of crap albums, then again in the 00s we waited for the big comeback & “St Anger” was a major disappointment (especially Ulrich’s cans) and “Death Magnetic” was a return to the roots but nothing really exceptional, more like some “stolen” ideas and riffs from their past (I just wonder do, those guys who argued with everyone about how great the two aforementioned album were, listen to them till now?).

 

Actually, I hardly managed to listen to this (what should I call it?) album. Musically, it is so bad it’s like I’m listening to Metallica jamming in their basement recording some ideas just for fun. It’s like they’re playing just to keep in shape and kill some time... instead they “killed” my ears. Lou’s continuum vocals on all the songs are more than irritating ‘cause that’s why they made this musical union in order to “musically dress” some lyrics that Lou had written. James is sometimes singing with his characteristic style in the background while Lou will surely jangle your nerves with his (meaningless) narration. The production is kind of “bulky” and the mixing really bad! Lou is all over the place and if you can handle to listen to all the songs continuously without getting a headache, then this will absolutely be a miracle! Needless to say, that the cover is awful, so the “gay” name (Lulu) of the album.

 

I can’t answer the question why and who thought of it. This is neither the new Metallica album nor the new Lou Reed one. But just a musical “masturbation” between those guys. Metallica continue to surprise us roughly… thank God they didn’t waste any good riffs on this piece of shit. I can’t see a reason why someone would go out and buy this rubbish. There are so many great bands out there that need our support, so do not waste your money on this trash album just because it says “Metallica” on the cover – which, thankfully, it doesn’t –  or because Metallica are part of it. This is the most embarrassing moment in the band’s career! I want to forget all about this bad joke… this is by far the worst album of the last decade… the rating is symbolic of course!